I came across some interesting quotes and thoughts on social media recently about how saying you are “finding” yourself isn’t exactly accurate. Those of us truly looking within our hearts and minds to become the best version of ourselves – are not lost. We are simply trying to remember who we were before the world got its hands on us.

In the past few years, I have been quite dedicated to rescuing stray cats, getting them medical attention and fostering them until I could find them homes. To date I have rescued and re-homed 10 cats, and I hope to continue. But that isn’t really the point of this reflection.

Several months ago, it was brought to my attention that I was being attacked on social media by the woman who married my ex. I certainly won’t waste my time acknowledging the petty digs and comments made by people who banded to her side and have never met me, however, one thing did resonate.

According to her, “all I have in my life is cats” and on some level, I should be ashamed and pitied for that. Obviously, the source reeks of insecurity, but it’s not an uncommon stigma to look down on “cat ladies” or people who actively work and bond with animals in their lives.

It’s ridiculous and ignorant to assume someone’s life isn’t fulfilling simply because they do not value or prioritize the same things that you do. It is also maddening that somehow it became a competition between women who have children and women who chose not to or cannot have them for a multitude of reasons. Not every woman without children cares about animals, and not all animal lovers use them as a substitute for a child we never had.

It gets even crazier when people try to make the incredible bond I had with my first two cats for over 16 years a negative thing. The only people who can understand how special it is to share your life with another species, are people who connect with animals in the same way. We will never convince the naysayers that we are fulfilled and happy in ways they couldn’t begin to experience themselves, because their hearts just can’t love outside the box.

That’s why, in my personal quest to live my best life and be my best self, I no longer worry about anyone’s opinion on how many cats I’ve rescued or decided to keep for myself. When I was a little girl, I spent so much of my time with cats on my grandfather’s farm.

When all is said and done, I feel more connected to that little girl today who would play with the kittens on the farm and worry about them if they got sick and tried to help them. That is who I was before the world got its hands on me – she was always here – and now she’s unapologetically being her true self.

To anyone who has loved and lost a precious pet in their lives – know that love is justified, valid, important, and just as real as any other type of love someone feels. Consider yourself extremely lucky to connect in that way with such special creatures – I sure do.